The BBC was absolutely giddy yesterday reporting a story about how Americans know more about the Simpsons than they do the First Amendment. Apparently, 20% of us think the right to own a pet is one of the freedoms guaranteed under the amendment. Only one in 1,000 could remember all five.
You know what the stinker is? Only 1,000 people were polled. Lucky that one dude got called, or else, statistically-speaking, NONE of us would know them all. I managed to get four of them (speech, religion, press, and assembly), but I forgot the right to petition the government for a redress of grievences. Silly me.
So this got the dear wife and I talking about what other seminal documents we could remember, and the conversation veered toward the Ten Commandments. Killing and adultery we remembered. Always good for married folks.
Not remembering all ten, I whipped out Exodus looking for them. I forgot what a wonderful treasure trove of archaic belligerence the book is! Had untold millions not been murdered over the millenia because of its priceless little tidbits, I would even characterize it as "amusing." Either way, it certainly provides persective.
Anyway, the reason I am here: I'd forgotten the frog part. Oh, man, can I stick this in my thesis? That would be awesome. Here we go, Exodus 8:1-14
1 And the Lord spake unto Moses, Go unto Pharaoh, and say unto
him, Thus saith the Lord, Let my people go, that they may serve
me.
2 And if thou refuse to let them go, behold, I will smite
all thy borders with frogs:
3 And the river shall bring forth frogs abundantly, which
shall go up and come into thine house, and into thy bedchamber,
and upon thy bed, and into the house of thy servants, and upon thy people, and into thine ovens, and into thy kneadingtroughs:
4 And the frogs shall come up both on thee, and upon thy
people, and upon all thy servants.
5 And the Lord spake unto Moses, Say unto Aaron, Stretch forth
thine hand with thy rod over the streams, over the rivers, and
over the ponds, and cause frogs to come up upon the land of
Egypt.
6 And Aaron stretched out his hand over the waters of Egypt;
and the frogs came up, and covered the land of Egypt.
7 And the magicians did so with their enchantments, and
brought up frogs upon the land of Egypt.
8 Then Pharaoh called for Moses and Aaron, and said, Intreat
the Lord, that he may take away the frogs from me, and from my
people; and I will let the people go, that they may do
sacrifice unto the Lord.
9 And Moses said unto Pharaoh, Glory over me: when shall I
intreat for thee, and for thy servants, and for thy people, to
destroy the frogs from thee and thy houses, that they may
remain in the river only?
10 And he said, To morrow. And he said, Be it according to
thy word: that thou mayest know that there is none like unto
the Lord our God.
11 And the frogs shall depart from thee, and from thy houses,
and from thy servants, and from thy people; they shall remain
in the river only.
12 And Moses and Aaron went out from Pharaoh: and Moses cried
unto the Lord because of the frogs which he had brought against
Pharaoh.
13 And the Lord did according to the word of Moses; and the
frogs died out of the houses, out of the villages, and out of
the fields.
14 And they gathered them together upon heaps: and the land
stank.
...and that's where all the current frog extinctions began.